《家》

此 “家” 非彼 “家”。它是我4年前写的一篇作文。中4那年被刚到新加坡教书的程老师深深地感染，借了巴金的《家，春，秋》来读。后来又因当时看过的谋港片，就在班上写了这么 “一篇成形的小说，只是文笔还不成熟，相信过了几年会更好的”(这是当年老师给予的评语〕的作文。作文的体裁来自于老师师范大学的考试题目。老师的老师走进了考场，咬了一口苹果，把苹果放下就出去了。所以老师也依样画葫芦，作文题目是 。。。。。。 咬了一口的苹果。 事隔多年，我也老了（这以成了大家的口头禅），看了十三姨的文章发表，我也豁出去了，来吧，有胆就继续看下去吧！（对不起十三姨，哈哈，借用了你的词） --------- 十六年来，我一直以为自个儿是生长在一个很幸福美满的家庭里。从小就被父母、爷爷奶奶、公公婆婆、叔叔婶婶们疼爱呵护着。他们在我那十六年说长不长的记忆里是那么地慈祥，那么地相亲相爱，根本没有电视剧里富有家庭里必有的勾心斗角。这个家就像是亚当花园里那鲜红的苹果，那么地诱人，让人看了好羡慕拥有它的我。苹果由一个老人翁保护着。他是这个园里的园丁，操纵着所有的一切，不让苹果被恶鸟吞蚀。但没人预料得到，从何时起，在那美美的苹果皮下，是让人看了恶心的肉。 种种的假象一直维持到我上中学。我开始听到家人对彼此的冷言冷语。叔叔一夜间变成了处心积虑密谋的小人、姑姑从贤良书德变成淫荡奸妇、爷爷从精明能干变成爸爸口中的老糊涂老顽固。爷爷花了一辈子打拼建立的跨国公司，现在由刚学成归来的小叔执管，爸爸则因为一次严重的错误投资计划，而被降职为“屈屈的总经理”。 不知道是爸妈在那时养成的习惯，喜欢在我面前讨论叔叔姑姑他们的事。 还是他们原本就是如此，只不过我不愿多听多想罢了，只愿从玫瑰玻璃里去看人与物。这个家也因为出现了这么一些瑕疵而让我觉得原本乏味的家也有那么一点点的有趣。这个红通通的苹果开始有点改变了，真让人期待喔！ 聚变在我高二那年发生了。正当我在准备大学入学考试时，爷爷病了。忽然间家家户户门户紧闭。爸妈三不五时就锁在房里开闭门会议，小叔也不再和许姐姐（小叔的女朋友，也是家中我最喜欢的人）带我一块儿出门去玩，姑姑一家人也不再和我们来往（后来才知道原来姑姑和姑丈在闹离婚）。有时爸爸会带着我们的家庭律师到爷爷的床前关心遗嘱的内容。这些我都看在眼里，因为我在放学后大多的时间就是陪在爷爷的身边跟他聊天解闷，就像小时候我生病爷爷陪在我身边一样。园丁病倒了的消息给秃鹰们跃跃欲试的机会，也得逞了。现实就是这般可恶，硬生生地揭露漂亮的外层底下那腐烂的果肉，让我不得不承认他的存在。 爷爷在大家的陪同下安详地死了。风光的葬礼是爸爸花了5天的时间筹备计划的，刚好在第6天爷爷去世时粉墨登场了。大伙儿在葬礼上哭得稀里哗啦的，追着灵车后头在街上又哭又闹。我因为功课的压力加上种种的原因病倒了，在许姐姐的搀扶下我送走了爷爷。出殡当天， 律师宣布了遗嘱的内容。爸爸成了公司的新任总裁、小叔则分到一大部分的流动财产自己开律师会务所，为贫苦的低下层服务，圆了自己一直以来的梦想。我还是继续住在这个“家”里，一直到我21岁的生日。爷爷的第二分遗嘱在我生日派对上由律师念出。从那晚起，我成了名副其实的大人，拥有上亿的不动产，脱离了这个家独自一人生活。我把一切丢给小叔夫妇管理，一人到世界各地游荡，就像是巴金《家》里的觉慧离家出走了。园丁在临死前已经为自己准备好了。他用那棵苹果树的种子另外种了一个苹果树，用3年的时间让它学着保护自己，还找来了自己的小儿子一家人暗中照顾题点。 现在的我已经是两个孩子的妈了。在奥州定居，夫妻两都是大学里的教授，生活并不算富有却也幸福美满。小叔一家人也经常往我家里飞。至于那个被咬了一口的苹果吗，我们虽然是生长在同一个园子里，风声把彼此的消息传到彼此的耳里，也仅如此。。

been sometime since i've blogged.
haha. so many things happened.
school, work, relationship...

tired har..
but there are also things to look forward to.
a trip near my bday - my birthday trip.
but got to bring forward due to koko's ROM..

3 weddings on my bday itself.. and i can only choose 2 to go.
haha. goes to show that its a very very good day!!

sometimes things just dont go as per expected.
things just refuse to move the way you intended.
details just gets more complicated and unravel by itself.

and thoughts are just too deep and complex to second guess, even by yourself.

sao paulo

oh yeah. i finally remembered something that i've yet to blog about....
my sao paulo trip.. just for rememberance.

its the first time i go on a trip alone
and this first time, i spent more than 20 hours on the plane, if you count in the waiting time and the landing time before i leave the aircraft, i believe it could all amount to 24 hours...

the flight is overall pleasant.. Emirates flight to dubai transit for a couple of hours than on my way to sao paulo - 14 hours flight...

slept, watched tv, watched pple, look at the stewards (haha), listen to pple ard me (many portugese, and surprisingly / not surprisingly many china pple - they're everywhere i go- dubai, sao paulo, singapore... everywhere)

there's this old couple on my dubai-sao sector sitting beside me.
the old lady 60 plus, can tell that if she's younger, she would be very pretty. she still kept her figure very well.. her hubby who doesnt know english was with her... everytime the flight took off, landed, they held their hands. throughout the whole flight, few words were exchanged, they helped each other out of their seats, back to their seats, had their meals.. most of the time whilst sleeping, they held their hands....

there was this indian lady, who took the window seat from sao to dubai, everytime drinks are ordered, she request for a bottle of vodka. vodka orange. without fail for all meals.... ... haha. making her money worth. but given my stomach for alcohol, i think i'll puke at the height and occassional motion sickness if there's turbulance...

thanks to the onboard entertainment, i managed to keep myself entertained.
completed the following shows:
1) Sherlock holmes,
2) Blind Side
3) Alice in Wonderland
4) 101 dalmations
5) some rugby and politics show whcih i forgot the title. (i slept throughout the first view, and woke up to rewatch the whole show only to fall asleep. i only completed this show on the third round, missing hte last segment cause i got to get off the plane)
6) 2012
7) i think there's something else, forgot what le..
oh there's bejeweled too...

the conference... for another time.
bed time now.

weekend...

weekends are getting more and more precious to me..

weekdays are getting more and more routine for me...

i suddenly miss that excitment, but at the same time i love this type of peacefulness....

does that show that i'm getting older???

hmmm.. interesting thought...

我要旅行！！！！

最近没有什么感触，就只是好想出国旅行！！

才刚从泰国未来一两个月，就又在想着出国，也想设法弥补之前的一些遗憾一些不足。。。。
想出去透一透气，远离工作，远离尘嚣。不必一直烦恼担心


我想出国！！

how do you spend 5 days at home, without parents, the whole house to yourself.

Day 1 - work. splendid dinner with him. back home, more work for my mom. miss them after chatting on the phone. first night facing the dark alone at home. can't get to sleep.

Day 2 - work. grandma house for dinner, home again attempt to sleep but can't. fever, and work again. the night went better after the medication. no one to turn to. i miss my dad. alot.

Day 3 - work again. work again. no lunch. home again. and then work. going to knock out soon. after the first 2 days, the third day at home alone is starting to be comforting.

Day 4 - work and then Mahjong. Finally life in the house.

Day 5 - sleep, tuition, sleep, grocery shopping, sleep
Day 6 - sleep, airport, and they're finally back.

I realise i'm not suitable for a career women, especially one that travels aroudn alone. I dont think i'll be able to take it. but i think i'm slowly getting used to it. Like it or not.

Stella, i admire you!!
How can you tahan?!??

小女人

我发现我是个女人，而他则是个大男人，一个不解风情的大男人。

小女人大男人之间开如何沟通，如何去体谅，如何去了解?

浪漫小女人遇上了苯呆大女人，谁生谁死，还是够维持到老相守一生？？

Everyone, I'm single again!!

I'm not going to post on FB, cause its goign to cause such a big wooha again.
but i think i can inform you guys here.

I think its time to let go.
Though i've not managed to totally let go yet.
But then i think its hard to maintain a lop-sided one.

Time to let go and embrace a new life.

Please feel free to date me out k.

Muacks.
Love you gals. All of you